Ask A Genius 1379: Wedding Planning, Family Speeches, and Nostalgic Fights
Author(s): Rick Rosner and Scott Douglas Jacobsen
Publication (Outlet/Website): Ask A Genius
Publication Date (yyyy/mm/dd): 2025/05/15
Rick Rosner is an accomplished television writer with credits on shows like Jimmy Kimmel Live!, Crank Yankers, and The Man Show. Over his career, he has earned multiple Writers Guild Award nominations—winning one—and an Emmy nomination. Rosner holds a broad academic background, graduating with the equivalent of eight majors. Based in Los Angeles, he continues to write and develop ideas while spending time with his wife, daughter, and two dogs.
Scott Douglas Jacobsen is the publisher of In-Sight Publishing (ISBN: 978-1-0692343) and Editor-in-Chief of In-Sight: Interviews (ISSN: 2369-6885). He writes for The Good Men Project, International Policy Digest (ISSN: 2332–9416), The Humanist (Print: ISSN 0018-7399; Online: ISSN 2163-3576), Basic Income Earth Network (UK Registered Charity 1177066), A Further Inquiry, and other media. He is a member in good standing of numerous media organizations.
In a candid dialogue, Rick Rosner describes his daughter’s wedding preparations, the exhaustion of detailed event planning, and the generational shift in social motivations. He recounts a thrift-store tuxedo slight, the importance of sentiment versus comedy in speeches, and nostalgically imagines “Billy Madison” fights against schoolyard adversaries with hilarious intensity.
Rick Rosner: So, my kid and her new husband are coming to L.A. in a couple months, and we’re throwing a get-to-know-the-new-couple party. My wife is putting it together—and she’s obsessing over every detail. And I just have to go along with it.
Scott Douglas Jacobsen:Sounds… exhausting?
Rosner: Well, no. She’s good at planning stuff. But she has to worry about every single detail—which, to some extent, is just part of organizing a good event. But she takes it beyond that, and then she wants my input on all of it.
I suppose that’s better than her not wanting my input. But it’s going to take up a ton of time.
Jacobsen: What’s the ratio here?
Rosner: The party will be about three hours long. The planning has already taken 30 to 40 hours. And it’ll take at least that much more.
Jacobsen: Do you find, as you’ve gotten older, that you don’t enjoy big social events?
Rosner: Honestly, I never really did. I never had a good time at them. The onlyreason I ever participated was that I wanted to meet a girl. And now that I have—there’s no reason to go to them at all.
Jacobsen: I believe you’ve met a girl so thoroughly that her daughter has now met someone, too. It’s a generational love cascade. Beautiful.
Rosner: [Laughing] Yes. There have been some social events that were worthwhile—the Emmys, Writers Guild Awards. Things like that.
But even then, they can go sideways. One time we were at the Writers Guild Awards. I was at a different table than Jimmy. I don’t know what I was wearing—some semi-fancy thing probably half-sourced from a thrift store.
I remember a yellow shirt, maybe part of a tuxedo-type getup. No bow tie. Just thrown together. Jimmy was sitting with J.J. Abrams. As I walked past, he said quietly, “You look like a clown.” Not loud. Just enough so I could hear it. And I think the only reason he said it was because—well, I probably did look like a clown.
He wasn’t trying to mess with me psychologically. He was just saying, “Hey, next time, wear something that doesn’t suck.”
Jacobsen: Did you improve for the wedding? So… did you wear something appropriate?
Rosner: Yes. I looked fine. I got a new suit at Kohl’s for $140, which is cheap for a suit, but I barely wear one. It fit. It worked. I looked fucking fine. Carole had my shoes re-laced and polished. I was ready.
Jacobsen: A TV lunchbox situation. You remember that line from Billy Madison? “My lunch packed up, my boots tied tight. I hope I don’t get in a fight.” I don’t know why, but I love that song.
Rosner: So, yeah—I dyed my hair to look a little younger for the wedding. But the dye didn’t really take. I did it a few days before, and by the time of the wedding, almost all of it had washed out.
Minimal effect, but I looked fine. Also—I wasn’t the star of the fucking deal. It was about my daughter and her husband. Nobody cared about me beyond the role I played. I gave a little speech. People always like my speeches because they’re funny.
Jacobsen: You’re a comedy writer. You know how to prep a good one.
Rosner: Yeah, I’ve written like 10,000 jokes. The bar’s lower at a family event because most family events don’t have a professional comedy writer on the mic. So I clear that bar easily. It’s fine.
Jacobsen: So the song—I checked. It’s called Back to School. He’s wearing those big ’90s jeans, light blue wash, and I think he had Lug boots on. Classic late-‘90s look. Here’s the actual lyric. Ready?
Rosner: Go for it.
Jacobsen: “Back to school, back to school, to prove to Dad that I’m not a fool. I got my lunch packed up, my boots tied tight, I hope I don’t get in a fight…” That’s it. About thirty, forty seconds of pure nostalgia.
Jacobsen: You don’t agree with the “I hope I don’t get in a fight” line?
Rosner: No, not really. He’s going back to kindergarten and working his way up grade by grade. Me? If I went back to school, I’d hope to get in a fight.
Jacobsen: With a second grader?
Rosner: Yeah, because I’d win. I’d absolutely wreck a second grader.
Jacobsen: [Laughing].
Rosner: Not saying I would, just that I could. I’d probably just pick them up by the waistband and say, “You little fucking dickhead, I know where you live. If you ever mess with me or anyone else again, I will do horrible, horrible things to you and your family. And if you ever tell anyone I said this? The things I do will be even worse.”
Jacobsen: [Laughing] That would get you quoted on Fox News. Then you could end it with, “…fellow kids.”
Rosner: But no, the deal is—I would hope to get in a fight with some little bastard. Maybe not a second grader—maybe an eighth grader. Like, when I Billy Madison my way into eighth grade. Or even a fucking PE teacher. I don’t know if PE teachers are as dickish as they used to be, but still.
Jacobsen: Yeah, so—back to weddings. Do you think, on average, when giving a speech, it’s better to land on sentimentality or comedy?
Rosner: You want both. Carole took care of the sentiment. She gave a really thoughtful speech about love, about what it means to be a couple. Then I came in with counterpoint—a few tips on how to win at couples counseling.
Jacobsen: That’s solid. Good contrast.
Rosner: Yeah. It worked. And I can say confidently—I landed better. I know how to do this shit.
Jacobsen: Respect.
Rosner: But it also makes me a little sad. I should’ve used my skills more. I should suck it up, even at my age, and go out and do a ton of stand-up until I get really good at it. It wouldn’t take me as long as it takes most people. I’ve been steeped in this stuff for decades. But I don’t have the gumption to go do that shit anymore. Still—I should. I fucking should.
Jacobsen: Plenty of late-in-life comics have made it.
Rosner: Yes, it could be about the stuff we talk about all the time—AI, the end of the world. There’s a ton of comedy to be mined from the ongoing and incoming tech semi-apocalypse.
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