On Tejano Music 6: Selena’s Father

Author(s): Scott Douglas Jacobsen

Publication (Outlet/Website): The Good Men Project

Publication Date (yyyy/mm/dd): 2024/10/19

A seasoned Musician (Vocals, Guitar and Piano), Filmmaker, and Actor, J.D. Mata has composed 100 songs and performed 100 shows and venues throughout. He has been a regular at the legendary “Whisky a Go Go,” where he has wooed audiences with his original shamanistic musical performances. He has written and directed nerous feature films, web series, and music videos. J.D. has also appeared in various national T.V. commercials and shows. Memorable appearances are TRUE BLOOD (HBO) as Tio Luca, THE UPS Store National television commercial, and the lead in the Lil Wayne music video, HOW TO LOVE, with over 129 million views. As a MOHAWK MEDICINE MAN, J.D. also led the spiritual-based film KATERI, which won the prestigious “Capex Dei” award at the Vatican in Rome. J.D. co-starred, performed and wrote the music for the original world premiere play, AN ENEMY of the PUEBLO — by one of today’s preeminent Chicana writers, Josefina Lopez! This is J.D.’s third Fringe; last year, he wrote, directed and starred in the Fringe Encore Performance award-winning “A Night at the Chicano Rock Opera.” He is in season 2 of his NEW YouTube series, ROCK god! J.D. is a native of McAllen, Texas and resides in North Hollywood, California. 

Scott Douglas Jacobsen: Let’s begin with a brief introduction to Selena, a significant figure in Tejano music who tragically passed away at a young age. Can you tell us about her upbringing, particularly her father’s role? What are some of the stories surrounding her childhood? To provide context, how did her father, Abraham Quintanilla, parent her? How did his approach differ from others? And how do families recognize exceptional talent in young people who can express it meaningfully? 

J.D. Mata: My perspective is based on things I’ve read and heard and my intuition. By intuition, I mean as a Mexican-American who grew up with a father who was a musician. For the sake of conversation, let’s imagine I’m Selena in this story, and I’ll share from the child’s perspective—whether that’s Selena or her brother, AB. I want to discuss Abraham Quintanilla, her father, because he reminds me a lot of my father, a musician. Let me begin by acknowledging that this is an exciting approach.

Based on what I’ve learned, it’s well-known that Abraham Quintanilla, Selena’s father, was a musician who had a band called Los Dinos in his younger years. He was a talented musician and served in the military, which is how he met his wife, Marcella. They fell in love and got married.

Their first child was Suzette, who went on to play drums in Selena’s band. Then, they had their son, AB Quintanilla III, followed by Selena. Because Abraham was a musician himself, he recognized his children’s musical talents early on.

He especially recognized Selena’s remarkable singing voice. When it comes to talent, you either have it or you don’t, and Selena certainly did. Abraham noticed that from a young age. Being a musician, he wanted to live his dreams through his children’s success. He believed that if anyone could guide and advocate for his daughter, it should be him.

It’s similar to how I would feel if I had a child with a talent for singing or acting. Although I don’t have children, I would certainly advocate for them if I did. Who better to steer that ship than a dedicated parent? To get to the point, Abraham was their mentor and music guru, not just their father.

He was the manager, booking agent, band founder, and more. One thing Abraham had, which many artists lack—and something I’ve struggled with but am improving on—is that he was a talented musician and a sharp businessman. After all, it’s called show business for a reason. Abraham Quintanilla deserves much credit for that.

I’m a huge fan and an advocate. I look at it from an academic or intellectual point of view. Without Abraham Quintanilla, there is no Selena because he was such a fierce and astute advocate for his kids. That’s why they made it. It would help if you had an intense, loyal advocate who’s there for you through thick and thin, and they indeed went through many trials and tribulations. Not only was he their manager, but he was also their father. You talk about a “papa bear,” and that’s what he was. He encouraged his kids to pursue music as a career, and that became his career, too.

He shifted from being a restaurant owner to investing in their music career, and the band even played at the family restaurant. Essentially, he was an entrepreneur. Being in the music field, especially in this capitalistic society, you must be an entrepreneur. You’re constantly persuading people to buy your product, and that’s precisely what he did—he convinced the public to buy Selena’s music. That’s capitalism 101: the exchange of goods and services without government interference, just one citizen persuading another to invest in their product. Abraham was selling Selena’s records and knew how to do it well.

When it came to the music itself, he was tough. Even though his kids loved music, he pushed them hard. He understood that talent isn’t enough—you must nurture it. Like watering a plant, you have to practice and perfect your craft. He knew that, as a musician himself. He ensured his kids rehearsed daily, even though they sometimes hated it. But that’s why they became so good. They weren’t just playing the same small, junky gigs everyone else was; they were mastering their craft.

If you want to discuss an American success story, look at Selena and her family. That is the essence of the American dream—coming from humble beginnings and achieving greatness through hard work. I don’t think that’s emphasized enough, how they’re a true American success story. Selena became musically successful, but it was only possible because her father was a genius—not just as a music manager or producer, but as an advocate for their brand. He was incredibly astute and a hard worker. He would even drive the bus to get them from gig to gig.

I know how tough that is because I’m on tour now. It’s brutal. You play the show, wake up the next day and drive to the following location. It’s exhausting—driving six to eight hours to the next gig, sometimes with your bus breaking down. That’s the grind they went through.

So not only was Abraham Quintanilla an incredible musician, manager, and mentor, but he was also a mechanic. When the bus broke down, he had to fix it. On top of all that, he was an exceptional father. Some might argue about how great he was, considering that Selena missed out on typical teenage experiences like prom or football games. But sometimes, success demands sacrifice, and that’s what their journey requires. Had Selena not been tragically killed, she was on her way to becoming an even bigger icon.

The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. We can see that in Selena’s entrepreneurial spirit. She had opened her clothing boutique, and there were rumours that she was planning to leave the band to focus on her boutique. Whether or not that’s true, the point is that she was set to become a millionaire as a fashion designer. And where did she get her entrepreneurial spirit? From her father.

We also must remember her mother, Marcella. Behind every successful man, there’s a strong woman. Marcella held the family together. While much of this is based on intuition, it’s clear that the strength of their family came from love. When you love your family, you support them, and I’m sure Abraham and Marcella were a strong team.

I’m presenting a perspective I have yet to see or hear elsewhere. It could be because I see the world differently as an artist and an entrepreneur. I’ve been a Tejano artist, and my father reminds me of Abraham Quintanilla. So, I bring a unique perspective to this conversation.

I’ve never met Abraham Quintanilla, though I’d love to. What I’m sharing is based on what I’ve read and my intuition as a Mexican-American and as the son of a musician who advocated for me and nurtured my talents. In some ways, I see Abraham as a father figure, even though we’ve never met. If we did, we’d look each other in the eye and understand one another immediately.

Abraham has been criticized for “living off his daughter’s name,” but I don’t see it that way. He’s simply keeping the record straight about what happened to Selena and preserving her legacy. Selena is known worldwide today because her father was astute enough to keep the rights to the first movie about her life. He had the vision to ensure her story was told correctly, understanding Selena’s brilliance, genius, and sacrifice and the entire family. He may face criticism, but Abraham knew people needed to hear Selena’s story. He was smart enough to ensure they heard it from the family rather than from speculative sources.

And I’m sure it was excruciating for him to relive all those memories and tell the story through the movie. Even today, it must still be unbearable for him. But despite the pain, he continues because of his deep love, passion, and devotion—to Selena, the brand, the craft, and the family. He has no choice but to carry on. By the way, Suzette is the older sister and continues to be involved. They’ve created a museum. They played a role in ensuring the Selena series was as accurate as possible.

Abraham Quintanilla he’s the root of it all. He’s the strong, traditional Mexican figure at the foundation of the massive “Selena tree” that has grown to reach the entire world. Without him, there would be nothing. That’s what I have to say about his role.

Are there any other questions related to that? For example, you asked about the marriage between Abraham and Marcella and what their love was like. It’s a love story, a beautiful one. The proof is in the fact that they’re still married. How often do you hear about families torn apart by tragedy like theirs? And then consider the music business—it’s brutal, it tears people apart. Yet, they stayed together through it all.

That’s real love. Of course, they’re human, and there must have been conflict, like in any relationship, but they made it through at the end of the day. That’s love. So, to answer your question, when you see them, you can’t help but recognize that their love is strong.

Intuitively, I feel this because my parents stayed together and loved each other deeply. While I’ve never met Abraham and Marcella, and I’m not a psychologist or family therapist, I base my understanding on what I’ve seen in interviews, what I’ve read, and my own experience.

Jacobsen: Were they a product of their generation, where marriages were likelier to stick it out? 

Mata: Probably. But they’re also living in a time when many couples from that generation haven’t stayed together. So yes, their generation may have shaped them, but I believe their love would have lasted in any era.

As for your question about how Abraham’s parenting style may have differed between Selena and her siblings, there wasn’t much difference. He seemed consistent based on what I’ve read and observed and my understanding of Mexican culture. It didn’t matter that Selena was the star or the lead singer—he treated them all the same.

He was strict with his rules. There was no drinking or smoking on the bus—not just for his children but also for the musicians. Everyone had to be in bed at a particular time. He had a policy of not interacting much with fans because he believed there needed to be a mystique between the artist and the audience. That mystique would fade if the fans got to know them too well. He enforced that with all of his children, not just Selena.

So he had a policy where you could talk to the fans but weren’t allowed to develop friendships with them to maintain that mystique. And it wasn’t just Selena; all the kids had the same treatment. It’s not that he outright forbade them from attending football games or proms, but the business demands didn’t allow it.

Most of their gigs were on the weekends when all the socializing happened at school. Eventually, Selena had to drop out of school, and she later earned her GED. I’m not sure about AB or Suzette, but I know Selena did it, and she also became an advocate for education. Based on the interviews I’ve read, she never complained about the path her life took. She understood how fortunate she was to be following her dream.

Abraham was equal in how he disciplined and guided all his children. He instilled professionalism in them and maintained their faith as a core part of their upbringing. I don’t want to speculate too much, but I believe they were associated with the Church of the Latter-day Saints, though I could be wrong. What’s clear is that faith was essential to their family, and they were God-fearing people, which Abraham instilled in his children.

By the way, I have a YouTube series called Rock God, and in episode 8, I meet Selena. It’s a fantastic episode where I visit her star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. While I’m there, I get hit by a guy on a scooter. I pass out, and while I’m concussed, Selena appears to me. So, if anyone reading this is interested, go to YouTube, search for Rocca JD Mata, and check out episode 8.

I mention this because, in the episode, I made a point of portraying Selena in a way that’s respectful to her faith. In the Seventh-day Adventist tradition, they believe that when people die, they don’t go to heaven right away; instead, they’re “sleeping” until Jesus returns. So, in the episode, Selena wakes up and says, “Oh, I’ve been sleeping,” to stay true to that belief.

Jacobsen: How’s your time looking tonight?

Mata: I’ve got a project I’m working on, so this will probably be it for tonight. Same time, we’ll get back into the groove.

Jacobsen: Great, I’ll see you then.

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