Teen Coaching for Mental Health
Author(s): Scott Douglas Jacobsen
Publication (Outlet/Website): The Good Men Project
Publication Date (yyyy/mm/dd): 2025/02/09 (Unpublished)
Jesse LeBeau, the Founder of the Attitude Advantage Program, emphasizes that parents must model healthy behavior, as teens absorb actions more than words. TAAP’s 12-week coaching program builds confidence, resilience, and self-esteem, helping teens overcome anxiety and social pressures. One-on-one coaching fosters trust, providing support beyond traditional therapy. TAAP’s 27-week school program engages students through interactive assemblies, teaching essential life skills. LeBeau stresses that failure is vital for growth and urges parents to encourage perseverance. Schools and communities can collaborate with TAAP to support teen mental health.
Scott Douglas Jacobsen: Half of mental health problems begin at age 14; what are critical steps can parents take to support teens?
Jesse LeBeau: The biggest thing that parents can do is WALK THE WALK. Your kid is a sponge and sees EVERYTHING you are doing, whether you realize it or not. The ‘do as I say, not as I do’ type of parenting is a cop-out for parents and will go in one ear and out the other. If you are yelling at your kid to get off the phone at the dinner table, but you are on your phone, it doesn’t matter what you say. They will think you are a hypocrite and not listen. It all starts with you. In almost all of the families we work with, when we do a deep dive into why a teen is struggling with anxiety, stress, depression, anger management, etc., we can almost always trace it back to a parent who is anxious, stressed, depressed, can’t control their anger, etc. If you are serious about your teen’s mental health, you need a teen cell phone contract; get yours here.
Jacobsen: What is TAAP’s 12-week online teen coaching program?
LeBeau: We help teens build unshakeable confidence and grit/resilience and master their attitude in 90 days. All the research, data, and experts show that if you can improve a teen’s self-esteem and confidence, you can positively impact virtually every aspect of their life…whether it’s anxiety, depression, substance abuse, or more serious issues, the kids who truly believe in and love themselves care less about what their peers think of them, whether it’s in person (or online) and they are drawn to the circle of friends that build them up. They are likelier to be leaders than followers, and this self-belief (and confidence) propels them to success in every area of their lives.
So, after we learned how critical self-esteem is for a teenager’s well-being and development, we put together a program 100% dedicated to helping teens build incredible confidence, and the results have been amazing. We do weekly group calls, personal lessons, tests, indexing, and 1-on-1 coaching, and lean into teens’ strengths instead of focusing on all the things they are unhappy with in their lives like therapy does. The key is making it fun so kids want to show up and get results. It doesn’t matter how much mom or dad wants an outcome for them; they have to want it for themself. The saying goes, ‘You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.’ The kids who get the most out of our program are the ones who feel like they are getting to choose to participate, and they are hungry to improve their lives for the better!
Jacobsen: How does this help with confidence, resilience, and a positive mindset?
LeBeau: If we can help any teen with these three things, we can greatly impact their life. Confidence can’t be given with positive affirmations or compliments. Confidence is earned by achieving things. Small wins add up over time; eventually, a young person has a stack of undeniable proof that they can do difficult things. They have to learn to fail and see that it’s not the end of the world and that they can get through it. Life is all about failing. The most successful people have failed repeatedly, but they keep going and can persevere long after most others have chosen to quit. A parent’s job is to prepare their child for the road ahead, not run ahead of their child on the road, and prepare for the road for their child by clearing out obstacles.
Jacobsen: Why the preference for round-the-clock support rather than intermittent/periodic
LeBeau: Teenagers need mentors who feel comfortable sharing what’s going on with their lives and who aren’t their mom or dad. Even kids with the best relationships with their parents don’t want to share everything with mommy and daddy. It isn’t always because they are trying to hide something bad. Many times, they are such a good kid that they don’t want their parents to worry about them, be stressed, or get involved in a situation they don’t have time for. You’ve probably seen that photo of the iceberg where 90% of it is underwater, and you can’t see it from the surface. That 90% under water is what is happening with most teens, and their parents aren’t aware of what is happening. We build rapport and trust in our program through being open and vulnerable as coaches, and as a result, the kids reach out to us with what’s going on in their lives when it happens in real time. It’s a beautiful thing.
Jacobsen: What are the benefits of one-on-one sessions with a dedicated life coach?
LeBeau: Life coaching for teenagers offers specialized support to help teenagers build essential life skills and personal growth strategies. Coaching sessions often focus on topics such as:
- Self-Confidence and Resilience: Empowering teens to strengthen their self-worth and face personal challenges with courage.
- Goal Setting and Achievement: Teens learn to set realistic goals and use effective strategies.
- Social and Emotional Skills: Whether one-on-one or in a group setting, teen coaching focuses on the interpersonal, social, and emotional skills critical for life long after graduation.
When exploring the idea of coaching versus therapy, it’s important to understand a teen coach’s role in your child’s personal growth. Acting as mentors and allies, the right teen coach is vital to your child’s success inside and outside the coaching program.
The right coach will provide an encouraging, non-judgmental space for your teenager to explore their talents, build resilience, overcome loneliness by working on relationship-building and social skills, and develop the assertive communication skills they need to make it through life.
Teen life coaches are specifically trained to meet teenagers where they are. They get on their level, tell real-life stories they can relate to, and encourage them to overcome hardships without fearing criticism or ridicule. A strong teen life coach will empower your child to take ownership of their own lives and success.
Working with a teen coach is similar to therapy, but the biggest drawback of that approach is that parents don’t get to be a part of the process. It also teaches kids to focus on all the negative things they are unhappy with in their lives, reinforcing a bad habit…ruminating on everything they don’t like repeatedly.
What we do is the total opposite; we TEAM UP with you (the parents) and work together to help them find the thing they are most passionate about and lean into that.
This leads them to build more confidence and focus on where they want to be in life instead of focusing on all the negative things in the past as therapy does.
The other big difference with us is that most kids are a lot less turned off by coaching versus therapy for many reasons. As coaches, we are open and vulnerable with the kids, creating a real relationship with trust and rapport. We expect the kids to be open and honest in return, which they usually are because they feel seen, heard, and genuinely cared about.
For more information on coaching vs. therapy, visit here.
Jacobsen: How does the more extensive 27-week school program on social-emotional learning resonate with students?
LeBeau: The big reason our school curriculum is such a hit is because we make it fun. We have music, intro videos, crowd participation, emotional storytelling, basketball tricks, etc. I’m sure you’ve heard the expression, ‘a spoon full of sugar to make the medicine go down.’ That’s what we do with our kick-off school assemblies. We give kids what they WANT so we can give them what they need. Once they are bought in, we can greatly impact their life.
We do a high-energy assembly at their school in person to get them fired up and emotionally connected to our founder Jesse’s underdog story. He’s given this talk to over a million kids and knows how to connect with them. They identify with going through hard times in their own lives. Once they have an in-person experience with someone famous and interested in them, they are more open to the weekly lessons their teachers walk them through. They are taught timeless life lessons you don’t normally learn in school, which are important for building confidence, grit/resilience, and learning to master their attitude. Everything taught in the TAAP School program is evidence-based and backed up with research and data.
For more on the program, you can check it out here.
Jacobsen: What are some examples of real-life lessons helping teens overcome challenges?
LeBeau: Life is tough. So, toto be prepared for this and succeed in life, kids need to learn to overcome and do toughthings. One of the best things that can happen to your teenager (within reason and if leveraged strategically) is for them to fail. Things like they got rejected when they asked that special someone to the dance, they didn’t make the sports team, they didn’t get the grade they wanted, etc. A smart parent will use these difficult moments to teach a lesson.
Guess what? Things didn’t work out. But it’s not the end of the world. No one died. You can ask someone else to dance. You can practice and try it out again next year. You can ask for a second shot at the test. It sucks seeing your kid struggle, but if you swoop in and rescue them every time a little discomfort happens, you are hurting them more than you are helping them. In general, the big winners in life fail the most; they keep going and see it as the necessary steps to get closer to where they want to go. Celebrate failure and focus on your child’s effort versus the outcome. It will make a big difference in helping your kid stand on their own two feet and thrive no matter what challenges life throws them!
Jacobsen: How can parents, schools, and communities get involved?
LeBeau: The best place for parents to learn more is https://theattitudeadvantage.com/welcome/
We visit schools every month nationwide, and we are on a mission to help teens TEAM UP and find their tribe so they can live healthier and happier lives!
Jacobsen: Thank you for the opportunity and your time, Jesse.
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